Better World Shopper

So I posted on facebook the other day that I found the greatest app of all time and I was totally addicted!

Check it out... Better World Shopper

I discovered it from one of my favorite blogs, Heather Hendrick and her family are missionaries in Haiti. She's currently doing posts on how they came to the decision to move to Haiti and how we can help the poor, whether that means from home or moving somewhere else to serve Him. You guys should check it out if you haven't.

Anyways back to the app. And there is also a book for those of you who don't have an apple device!

I've expressed before on this blog how important it is to me to spend my money wisely and to support companies who make a difference in a good way not a bad way. My wedding anniversary marks exactly one year since I've bought any clothing from a mall (disclosure: I had to buy new work pants and that's not possible to find in a thrift store but I seriously tried.) I've only bought clothing second hand, or from non-profits. I guess I found this app at the perfect timing because now that I've finished the end of my one year commitment I don't want to forget why I made this commitment in the first place. It is so important to me to spend my money in a way that helps others. I personally am not okay with the ways that some companies treat their staff in third world countries. One can argue that those people or in some cases children need the money regardless of how bad their working conditions are. But I know there are still going to be thousands of people buying these products if I stop. I want my money to affect people positively. There is a lot of great organizations that I love that empower women in third world countries and pay them extremely fair wages as well as teach them savings and life skills. These women have dreams and can raise their families on their own. I love that buying these products makes me feel good, and makes me feel like I'm impacting the lives of those less fortunate than me.

So this app is pretty great. It rates companies on five different factors.
1. Human Rights (sweatshops, child labor etc.)
2. The Environment (recycling, renewable energy etc.)
3. Animal Protection (animal testing, factory farming etc.)
4. Community Involvement (volunteer efforts, nonprofit alliances etc.)
5. Social Justice (fair wages, fatalities etc.)

I started this journey hoping that the clothing I could buy would make a difference and support things that were important to me. Now I can try to buy almost everything in a reasonable way. Like this app has everything, from airlines to gas to granola bars to cleaning supplies to gum. Companies are rated on a scale of A to F.

One of the most interesting things that I discovered is that a lot of the companies that advertise the things they are doing in third world countries, didn't actually do that good. And some companies that have come under a really bad rap for sweatshops etc. actually had way higher grades than I thought they would. I guess that just reminds me that advertising is that, advertising and tries to convince us to buy the product no matter what that means.

I'm really excited that I feel I can make informed decisions about what cleaning supplies I buy and also how I grocery shop. For some people this doesn't matter and I understand that. But for me it is really important and I will switch what I usually buy if it means the new product will make a better impact on the world. Check it out and make a decision for yourself and your life. Whatever that means. For me its drastic but maybe for you its baby steps and that's okay. We have a lot of opportunities to make an impact in this world and how we spend our money is one of the largest ways we can make an impact!

Life lately...

"Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and, above all, those who live without love."
-Albus Dumbledore

Saw 7.2 yesterday, and it did not disappoint. I've grown up with Harry Potter. My mom has read me the books since I was a little girl and I've seen every movie as soon as it opened! I'm actually really sad that this era in my life has ended. I'm totally the geek that reads the books every year and I'm feeling a huge marathon once 7.2 comes out on video!

I went camping this weekend which was quite the adventure for me. I'm not a camper, I'm a hotel person. But I lived and in spite of some serious sleep deprivation I greatly enjoyed my time. I'm so incredibly grateful for my husbands' family. We all get along so great and I completely enjoy spending time with them, even if its which camping... My nieces and nephew completely steal my heart every time I`m with them. I have some serious baby fever and get a little frustrated by my long timeline to get my babies home. Five years is a really long time, but I want to make the most of the time I have just Shaun and I.

Work has been really frustrating lately. I`ve been feeling the same way I did before my job changed. I can feel my anxiety raising every Sunday night just knowing I have to get through another work week. I`ve been praying about this a lot and if God doesn`t want me at Canadian Tire anymore I really want that to be evident. I feel like work has just been bringing me down in the rest of my life. It tires and drains me out so much I feel like I`m not myself in the rest of my life. I think my biggest frustration with my job is I have such a passion for serving people and I want my life to make a difference. I don`t feel like my job allows that in the way I want. It`s so easy to say I would like a job with less stress and pressure and politics, but won`t that be in every job? I don't know for sure. The grass is always greener on the other side and I'm aware of that. But at the same time the thought of staying at this job until I have kids sends me until a full panic and completely overwhelms me. I don't think I'll make it without going off the deep end. Well pray with me if you want....

It's been the birthday month. Shaun's two Sundays ago and Dad's this last Sunday and my brothers is on Friday. Shaun hates presents and parties and I broke all the rules and bought him a watch that was way more money than I ever thought I would spend on a watch. Needless to say once he was over the anger he loves it!

Well sorry if this was a little scatterbrained but this is what I've been living lately!

My take on the STM conversation...

Blog world is currently in uproar about this thing we call STMs.

Kinda sounds way to close to STDs.

But seriously I'm going to try to be mature about this whole Short Term Missions thing. Because I have an opinion. It might be different than yours but that is okay.

STMs have been huge in my life and my walk with God. They have changed how I live and my beliefs. They have given me deep passions that I know are from the Lord. They are trips that I would never go back and change, and experiences I think others should have too.

My first STM was to good ol' America. It was through YWAM and we went to Denver for training and classes and then went into New Mexico to serve on the Navajo Reservation. What an experience that was. My little grade ten self sharing my faith with an animist in the market. It was the first time in my life I was forced to defend my faith. We also had many opportunities to serve the local church building (painting, sanding, etc.) What I look back upon that trip the greatest impact was probably had upon the youth on the team. It is possible that our park ministry and market ministry God used in someones life. It is also possible that they all just walked past us and didn't think about it again. But God truly changed me on that trip. He opened my eyes to His heart for the World. For the first time I saw beyond my little Mennonite town into the vast mission field before us.

My second STM was to Mexico. There we taught VBS for one week to an amazing group of kids who would not have had that opportunity had a team not come to serve. We practically shared the gospel and built relationships. This ministry relied on STMs coming in during the summer to run their VBS programs. We also helped in painting their new building. My heart broke for these kids during this trip. Kids who needed love and really needed Jesus.

My third STM was a longer trip to Uganda. God completely transformed my life during this trip. He evidently showed me the path He wants me to live. He showed me His deep heart for the poor. He gave me a passion for adoption. Most people I know will tell you that I came home from my two months in Uganda changed. I gave as much as I could during those two months and I pray that I made a small impact in a child's life.

There is a lot of criticism floating around about STMs and I will say sometimes they are done really badly. I'm sure every LTM has stories about some obnoxious person who came on an STM and made their life miserable for the entire time they were there. I've seen it first hand while I was in Uganda, people who were there just to take their pictures so they could go home and brag that they loved Africa and they are better Christians that you because they went and really served God with actual poor people. It happens. Poverty tourism happens and it sucks. It's not Godly at all and it makes me just as mad as you all do.

I'm reminded of what love really is:

If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love. Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't strut, Doesn't have a swelled head, Doesn't force itself on others, Isn't always "me first," Doesn't fly off the handle, Doesn't keep score of the sins of others, Doesn't revel when others grovel, Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, Puts up with anything, Trusts God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back, But keeps going to the end. 1 Corinthians 13:3

But sometimes people go on STMs with the right heart. A heart wanting to serve and to love. My youth kids just went out to Chicago to serve there for two weeks, and I can hardly wait to see how God changes their hearts. They want to serve Him and they all truly feel called to go on this trip. How can you tell me that's wrong?

See our God is so much bigger than messed up missions trips and I truly believe that when people go out with the right heart, Gods Grace will cover their mistakes and He will use it for His glory.

I also think that STMs lead to LTMs. Most LTMs you talk to started their journey in missions with an STM. They didn't just take the plunge, they dipped their feet first and God captured their heart and pulled them in full force. I also think that people who have been on STMs tend to give more to the work of missions. It is a lot easier to give your money when you've seen the fruits of it in action.

My biggest worry with all this talk is that people will start using bad STMs as an excuse. The excuse to sit on their lazy butts and do nothing for His kingdom. We must remember God calls us to go out.

Still later, as the Eleven were eating supper, he appeared and took them to task most severely for their stubborn unbelief, refusing to believe those who had seen him raised up. Then he said, "Go into the world. Go everywhere and announce the Message of God's good news to one and all. Whoever believes and is baptized is saved; whoever refuses to believe is damned. Mark 16:14-16

The poor, the needy, the widow and the orphan. We are called as Christ followers to love and take care of the least of these. I pray that we will not be ignorant of the needs around us. There are needs in my town and province, but also across the World and as a Christ follower I need to be doing all I can to help all of them. I am not only responsibly for my community for Jesus said, "Go into the World." We can't all become LTMs, though that would be amazing. If you aren't called to be an LTM, support an LTM, help meet their monthly expenses. Support organizations started by locals in third world countries. These people want to help their own, they don't always want help from us but sometimes they need help get that started, we can do that. Support aid organizations in countries going through extremely hard times. There is a huge drought right now in East Africa, why not give money to feed people who will die without the help. I strongly suggest giving to STMs because Gods grace can use these trips to change hearts and life directions. And if an STM changes the life of one person is it not worth that one lost sheep? 

We also need to remember the poor aren't always a flight away and there are great opportunities to serve right here. Local soup kitchens and food banks always need extra hands and donations. Churches have some great outreach programs that need volunteers. Pray about your role in "reaching the World." Jesus said our outlook must be global. So maybe that means time given on home base and finances given on the global base? Ask Jesus where He wants you to be serving, giving your time and money? And please don't use bad STMs as an excuse to sit on your butt and do nothing for God. There are so many out there that need help and need the gospel. Go and do something!

Would Jesus go to my Church?

Sometimes I struggle with the differences between Jesus' ministry and church ministry today. I'm curious as Christians, aren't we supposed to be Christ-followers to mimic our Savior in every way possible. And Church is the body of Christ, so our rule book should be first and foremost the ministry of Christ? I think we have long been putting on twist on Church and Christianity. This is not the first generation in fact it has likely been going on since the beginning of the Church. We like to adapt things to us, to our comfort, to our needs. We want to be fulfilled and enjoy the church experience.

One of my favorite things about Jesus’ ministry was that he focused on twelve. Jesus spoke to the masses but he had twelve disciples whom He taught, served, worked alongside, broke bread with, traveled with etc. He poured himself and His love into only twelve. Jesus could have ministered to thousands every single day but He saw the value in close relationships. I think our pastors need to remind themselves of this sometimes, Jesus did speak to crowds and ministry to the masses but the majority of His energy was spent building into only twelve. This is one of the reasons why I struggle when people get lost in the crowd of big churches, in fact people get lost in the crowd of small churches too. We need to remember as the body that it is not the pastors’ job to minister to all of us, he has his twelve. This is where it is our responsibility to step up as the body of Christ and reach out to those in our churches and in our community.

What about how Jesus reached out, or how He held services. Never once did Jesus ask us to change anything about ourselves to come to Him. He meets us wherever we are. Where in the Bible does it say that worship is only through song and in Church we follow that with corporate prayers and then teaching? The bible doesn’t have a play by play of what Church should look like but we are able to look at how Jesus ministered. Are we ministering to people as He did? Are we reaching out the way He did? Many people struggle with conventional ways of “worship” the church was always put an emphasis on song, but what about those who don’t like singing at all. I love worshiping the Lord through song and it is the highlight of Church for me on many occasions but I am one person and God created us all so differently. He didn’t create one carbon copy of what a Christian should look like. Yet He created us all in His image, which means we are meant to be this way. He didn’t make mistakes. So those who worship better alone outside with just their Bible, or in a fishing boat with a good friend, or watching a sunset, or in a long drive through the Rockies, or riding a horse. They were created to worship this way and there is nothing wrong with that. God wants songs but He also wants our lives and I think those who can truly worship in everything they do have caught on to what God intends for our lives. 

So as a Church how do we cater to all these needs? First, we must acknowledge that it is okay for people to worship and learn in all different ways. This is how God created them and it is prideful for us to say that ‘our’ way is better or how God intended it. Second, what can we learn for Jesus? Jesus went unto the crowds, He walked with them, He talked with them, Jesus wasn’t afraid of getting His hands dirty. Jesus didn’t stand at the front of the synagogue and ask His followers to sing their praises to Him. Jesus was much more practical. He saw their need to learn so He taught. He saw they were blind, so He gave them sight. He saw they were hungry, so He fed them. Jesus met them exactly where they were and then addressed their most obvious needs. Is it meeting people where they are to expect them to come into our churches and worship and learn exactly as we do? No, it is our responsibility to go out and meet them exactly where they are. And our focus must not be to get them into our churches; our focus must be first and foremost showing them God’s love.

To wrap this entire blog post up I want to quickly share why I’m so excited about the direction and vision my Church is heading in. We are attempting to acknowledge that people learn and worship differently by creating as many different “worship environments” as the Lord allows. Currently there is a contemporary and a traditional, and in fall we are beginning and liturgical service. I’m excited to see where this all heads as a Church we acknowledge and support that we are all created different and that is exciting and what makes us the “body” of Christ. We aren’t all created the same and it’s about meeting people where they are, the way they worship and learn and ministering to them in that place. Not expecting people to be like us or to be at a certain place in their faith to participate in Church. Because let us all remember “while we were still sinners, Christ died for us...” No expectations to be a certain person, right where we were, He met us and gave His life for us. What a great God we serve!

Why do we as a society view so negatively people who are "shy?

Those labels are put upon kids no matter how young. How many times has this happened to you? You say Hi to a friends small toddler, the toddler looks away, or starts crying. "Oh she's just being shy, she's not usually like this." Or they look at the child, "Stop being silly and say Hi to the nice lady..." Barely two or three and they are being told that it is a bad thing to be shy. When adults talk about someone being "shy" listen to the tone in their voice. It is extremely rare that I hear someone talk about being shy as a good asset or something they want to be. No one wants to be quiet or uncomfortable, the awkward person in the circle of friends.

As an extrovert I admit that I spent most of my life not understanding "shy" people. Many times I have been the person negatively talking about those who are shy. I hope those people forgive me for my ignorance. I never knew the treasures that were buried in there. If only I had taken the time, and kept trying even if it wasn't easy. God created me an extrovert but that doesn't mean I should only socialize with others like me. It means he's given me the gift to be able to reach out to those who maybe don't love making conversation, to be the one to talk and ask the questions until that person may choose to trust me and open up.

Then I met this guy, and I happen to think he's pretty great. I took some time and got to know him. I feel honored that he chose to open up to me, that I'm the person he's himself around. One of the biggest learning experiences since I've been married to that man is watching him interact with others. Sometimes I want to beg people to not give up, to keep digging even though it might not be easy all the time. I have watched the payoff with my parents as Shaun is now himself around them, and they have been blessed to reap the benefit of a lot of months of effort.

So since I've been married to Shaun my eyes have really been opened to how the mind of an introvert works. I'm not speaking to all but this is how my husband functions. Unless he is comfortable around you (which would take a very long time so don't expect him to be in the first couple months) being with people is extremely draining. It takes all of an introverts effort and energy to put them self into a conversation. It is not that they do not want to be included or are trying to be rude but conversation doesn't come as naturally as it does to us extroverts. When he gets home from being out he is tired and talked out (something I can hardly comprehend.) My husband finds large crowds very intimidating, especially in a setting like church where we are known by so many people there is a lot of small talk. Sometimes it is more restful for him to stay home, and that is okay. Sometimes I go to events without my husband and we're okay with it that way. I also have grown to deeply love being home with just him and no longer feel the need to be out with friends all the time but have chosen instead to build into the relationships that matter in my life.

So I guess my message to extroverts is to keep trying. That shy person really does want to be your friend even if they don't express it the same way others would. And they are probably an amazing person underneath all that "shy"ness. It will be worth the wait and the effort. And try not to use the word shy in a bad way, they were created that way and that means God intended some people to be quiet and keep to themselves. And God doesn't make mistakes so there was intent in that decision. He knew the world needed people like my husband to balance everything out and to be full of special gifts and qualities. Be aware for your words can hurt people in ways you cannot imagine. And if you are a shy person I pray people will come into your life that will make the effort and also that you won't have shame or guilt for being shy. It is truly how you were created (born this way baby!) and it doesn't make you weird or not fun to be around!

Call Me Jacob

Wednesday I was blessed with some amazing one on one time with an amazing woman. During that time she shared with me an article, one I want to share with you today. It truly spoke directly to my heart during this season of my life. Sometimes, I blame God for how I feel. Why doesn`t He make me feel better. But then my life is not the worst there is out there, not by far. He doesn`t stop suffering in the world. He allows 19 year olds, days away from graduation to be killed in car accidents. Young girls at the peak of their lives are run over by trucks. He allows starvation and sickness. He has taken away parents from 147 million orphans. So today as I wrestle with these thoughts I will fight with God. I will give Him my anger and my hurt. For He knows how I feel, He understands better than anyone else.

You can find the article here.

Read it if you need some encouragement for your season in life.


...Finally, I wrestle with God. My existence is his fault. He said he loved me and I believed him. Now I strike him with my pain as hard as I dare, trying to reconcile his love with the fact of a world still broken. I stretch and strain in the darkness, trying to grasp some sense of his care, something to help me believe he is the father I so need him to be. His hushed holding of me as I struggle is a strangeness I almost cannot bear. I long to escape him, to finish this fight, yet I know that he is the cause, the opponent, the peace I need all in one. Every question, every strike is to and for him, no part of this darkness can be explained apart from his troublesome existence. The only thing I hope to win is the working of his hand. He is my opponent, and he is my prize. My enemy, and the lover I yearn for with all of my soul. Whatever shall I do?

If I follow Jacob’s story, then I will cling to God until I am blessed. I will clutch at his arms until he claims me as his own and gives me a name as his child. But I am afraid to end like Jacob, for the tale of his fight is a strange one, and the ending of it, more than I understand. Of course, God won. Jacob could not out-wrestle the one who made his own muscles, nor out-argue the one who gave him speech. God lamed Jacob in the end and perhaps the laming was mercy. For I think that Jacob might have struggled to death in his anger and fear. But Jacob clung even beyond that breaking, clung until God himself yielded a curious prize... - Sarah Clarkson

Lamentations 3:19-36

I'll never forget the trouble, the utter lostness,
   the taste of ashes, the poison I've swallowed.
I remember it all—oh, how well I remember—
   the feeling of hitting the bottom.
But there's one other thing I remember,
   and remembering, I keep a grip on hope:
God's loyal love couldn't have run out,
   his merciful love couldn't have dried up.
They're created new every morning.
   How great your faithfulness!
I'm sticking with God (I say it over and over).
   He's all I've got left.

 God proves to be good to the man who passionately waits,
   to the woman who diligently seeks.
It's a good thing to quietly hope,
   quietly hope for help from God.
It's a good thing when you're young
   to stick it out through the hard times.

When life is heavy and hard to take,
   go off by yourself. Enter the silence.
Bow in prayer. Don't ask questions:
   Wait for hope to appear.
Don't run from trouble. Take it full-face.
   The "worst" is never the worst.

Why? Because the Master won't ever
   walk out and fail to return.
If he works severely, he also works tenderly.
   His stockpiles of loyal love are immense.
He takes no pleasure in making life hard,
   in throwing roadblocks in the way:

Stomping down hard
   on luckless prisoners,
Refusing justice to victims
   in the court of High God,
Tampering with evidence—
   the Master does not approve of such things.